You’d never write a lie in Sharpie. It’s permanent.
It is now the fourth day of public hearings in the House of Representatives impeachment inquiry into the highly controversial and now infamous phone call between President Trump and President Zelensky of Ukraine.
Today featured testimony from three administration officials, most notably, U.S. ambassador to the EU Gordon Sondland. While all testimony is important in such a high profile case, the entertainment value of Sondland’s testimony is unmatched.
The source of all the amusement stems from the phone calls made between Trump and Sondland. Calls that covered topics ranging all the way from A.$.A.P Rocky, to what Trump wanted from Zelensky.
Given the gravity of the proceedings, it’s quite bemusing to hear the rappers’ name brought up and forever transcribed in offical record. The A.$.A.P call had to do with the rappers intermittent in Sweden following an alleged assault case.
While AP Rocky trended on Twitter (because Twitter), the next Sondland quote would go on to ignite Twitter in a frenzy.
“I want nothing. I want no quid pro quo. I just want Zelensky to do the right thing, to do what he ran on,” Sondland quotes as Trump’s response to his question.
There you have it. What more proof could anyone desire? Trump clearly said he wanted nothing in return. No quid pro quo.
Trump even quoted himself on the lawn of the White House, after watching some of the testimony himself.
Bada-bing, bada-boom, case closed, wrap the show up folks, we’re going home. Or not.
Unfortunately for the Donald, he may have wanted to stay tuned in just a little longer before graciously delivering his speech of innocence to the masses.
Apparently, the phone call in which Trump vehemently claims he wants absolutely nothing in return from the Ukranian president happened on the same date Congress was informed of the whistleblowers’ complaint.
So close, Donald, so close.
To make matters worse for the POTUS, a reporter was able to snap a quick shot of Trump’s notepad, on which he had written his declaration of innocence. On it, was Trump’s own quote, written in bold, black, wait for it…Sharpie.
Close-up photos of Donald Trump's notes reiterate the president's message to reporters today: "I want nothing. I want nothing. I want no quid pro quo"— POLITICO (@politico) November 20, 2019
📷 Gettyhttps://t.co/CpKbxdfDx8 pic.twitter.com/omTx6hbKuD
This isn’t the first time Trump has used Sharpie’s for official purposes, and it hasn’t gone much better for him this time around, either.
Not only was Twitter aghast at the notion that a simple phone call after the fact could clear one of guilt, but that the President of the United States used a Sharpie to write down an official, albeit basic, statement.
It should be no surprise that the meme’s and hysterical reactions were quick to follow.
"I WANT NOTHING" reminds me of: pic.twitter.com/knuXWA3oRa
— Mr Brooklyn (@MrBrooklynB) November 20, 2019
"I WANT NOTHING."
— Matt (@nosoupforgeorge) November 20, 2019
I WANT NOTHING!
— Me and @realDonaldTrump
Ain't catching us in shitttttte
— Ali Alexander (@ali) November 20, 2019
Trump's "I WANT NOTHING" note, translated: pic.twitter.com/azfUGNP6uQ
— Nick Jack Pappas (@Pappiness) November 20, 2019
You can sing the presidental talking points to the tune of Frere Jacques. Try it. It’s fun.
I want nothing
I want nothing
I want no
Quid pro quo
Tell Volodymyr Zellinsky
I will do the right thing
— Scott Peters (@ScottPetersSD) November 20, 2019
Trump did what any rational, even-tempered, innocent person would do in this scenario: he took notes on his own quoted statement in an a Sharpie the size of George Kent's water bottle and and then shouted a statement at reporters. https://t.co/4Eo7Q5KBI2
— R. Eric Thomas (@oureric) November 20, 2019
I WANT NOTHING
but I would like… pic.twitter.com/xUR4p3XGIc
— Radical Proletarian ✊🏽 (@jayrq6o9) November 20, 2019
— Logan Doss (@AttyDoss) November 20, 2019
trump has to remind himself, twice, in Sharpie "I WANT NOTHING."
He'll need to remember those words when his prison cellmate, Bubba, wakes him up in the middle of the night. pic.twitter.com/LIlelzWrHP
— BrooklynDad_Defiant! (@mmpadellan) November 20, 2019
In this context, #IWantNothing is the rough equivalent of walking into a bank with a gun and money bag and saying
I want nothing.
I want nothing.
I am not robbing the bank.
(handing the bag to the teller and waving the gun and then saying) do the right thing.
— Perry Brown (@the_real_PnB) November 20, 2019
WHICH “I WANT NOTHING” IS MORE CONVINCING—THE FIRST OR THE SECOND? pic.twitter.com/PWmm8idwC2
— Eric Wolfson (@EricWolfson) November 20, 2019
When yall are talking about "I WANT NOTHING"
thought yall were talkin bout this pic.twitter.com/gyoE5A25xI
— Computer-Hand (Supreme Over-Lord of Canada) (@ComputerGull) November 20, 2019
I WANT NOTHING (2019) pic.twitter.com/KR7gs0HqH6
— Disney Prime Video (@GetDisneyPrime) November 20, 2019
He’s got some printed tweets ready just in case the “I want nothing” defense doesn’t go over well. pic.twitter.com/EAyiPzMAkX
— Jody Sherron (@jodysherron) November 20, 2019